How Clickbait helped me realise I was old. You won’t believe what happened next!

 

Point taken

 

So I was talking to an old friend recently about birthdays, and he was echoing a sentiment that I too had previously held about this annual anniversary, aka The Day Of Dread. That day when friends and family go out of their way to make your birthday great by (rather pointedly I feel) reminding you that the glory days of your youth are even longer past, some part of your anatomy is probably about to start failing, and senility and possibly even incontinence are just over the horizon which is oh look – that much closer! My Amateur Armchair Psychologist Antennae had sprung to full attention when this friend confessed that he had hated every birthday since somewhere around his 25^th, because as an ACoN I too understand the power of birthdays over those of us who were badly damaged as children; birthdays are painful reminders that we are physically aging but yet still unable to grow up into adulthood.

How I lost God and found him again in the fridge while on a pink elephant

The most aptly named drug ever

Disclaimer:  I have taken a fair few recreational drugs over the last 20 years. I’m not proud of this fact but I’m not ashamed either. I am aware that drugs can be the source of serious problems for some people and I will never make light of that. However my drug taking was just part of who I was at the time and I’ve had many fabulous times with them, and a few not so fabulous times with them. I’m not taking any at present but I’ll never say never. If this bothers you then walk away now because this post kicks off with one of my funner drug moments…

Zen & The Art of Subjective Reality

A typical Buddhist Monastery

So I was walking back to work from the psychologists’ office this morning and there was a young man standing in the mall with a shaved head and orange robes holding an alms bowl. Something in his physical attire made me think ‘Buddhist’, and ‘now there’s something you don’t usually see on the streets of Sydney’ and ‘how can there be a stone monastery full of monks on a craggy snowy hillside in Sydney and I’ve never noticed it before?’, and that got me thinking of Liam Neeson with a goatee in The Dark Knight and then…

Inside every ACoN there’s a frumpy schoolteacher trying to get out. Or not.

OK, so maybe it would a bit cooler if it was the other way around, and our lifes calling is actually as a hot kick-arse assassin once we stop hating ourselves. Given that I’m a bloke, becoming a hot femme fatale is a bit of a stretch. Shame. I’m probably a chubby computer nerd with a scifi fixation under it all. Oh wait, that’s my cover.

Why do my eyes hurt?

I am a great fan of The Matrix, which is the 2nd best film ever made. Bolt is greatest film of all time, in case you were wondering. I can just see you nodding your head in agreement as you read this. “What could ever top Bolt?” I hear you say. And who didn’t cry when Mittens tells Bolt about her owners leaving her behind? Or sing along to the best theme song of all time? Exactly. Feel free to share your favorite Bolt moment in the comments.

Anyhoo, I digest…